i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
