I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
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