Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
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