I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Randomize
