waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
