If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I just found a bag of teeth...
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
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