The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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