would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize
