Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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