i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
love makes seman taste better
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
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