conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
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