then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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