evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
i dont even know how to be here
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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