it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize
