my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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