I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Randomize
