Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
