I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
