you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Randomize