wrigley field is MILF paradise
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
as a side note pls kill me
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
