At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
