Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
