She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
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she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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