So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
