Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
But theres a keg here and me gusta
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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