i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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