My friends, they love my intelligence
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
