You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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