i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
It was confusing and full of hummus
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
