a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
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