Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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