Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize
