my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.