Texts From Last Night

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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?

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  (603): Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry? http://tfl.nu/3wve
  Replies (40) Good night (858) Bad night (4471)
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings

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  (901): oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass (901): fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings http://tfl.nu/b0u6
  Replies (118) Good night (4484) Bad night (1419)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.

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  (240): So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak. http://tfl.nu/34fx
  Replies (30) Good night (5732) Bad night (985)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...

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  (303): maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing... http://tfl.nu/2fyx
  Replies (11) Good night (1194) Bad night (3897)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"

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  (615): She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits" http://tfl.nu/yc53
  Replies (9) Good night (2897) Bad night (1138)
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  (302): View more from Delaware

  Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off

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  (302): Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off http://tfl.nu/cpmq
  Replies (7) Good night (2360) Bad night (1857)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.

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  (850): Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either. http://tfl.nu/w5pa
  Replies (7) Good night (1012) Bad night (2263)
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  (925): View more from California

  But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point

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  (925): But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point http://tfl.nu/knq2
  Replies (5) Good night (1156) Bad night (672)
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  (563): View more from Iowa

  I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?

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  (563): I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join? http://tfl.nu/9f19
  Replies (5) Good night (596) Bad night (1234)
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  (514): View more from Quebec

  the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon

  (514): View more from Quebec

  what does alcohol mean

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  (514): the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon (514): what does alcohol mean http://tfl.nu/hh45
  Replies (2) Good night (1433) Bad night (717)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos

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  (814): The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos http://tfl.nu/br7k
  Replies (3) Good night (1082) Bad night (573)
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  (+63): View more from

  there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi

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  (+63): there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi http://tfl.nu/ylbm
  Replies (5) Good night (1200) Bad night (691)
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  (352): View more from Florida

  Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.

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  (352): Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life. http://tfl.nu/37e0
  Replies (1) Good night (835) Bad night (379)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home

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  (775): He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home http://tfl.nu/6g10
  Replies (6) Good night (1078) Bad night (458)
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  (828): View more from North Carolina

  I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.

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  (828): I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals. http://tfl.nu/0dw4
  Replies (2) Good night (387) Bad night (578)

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