Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet. http://tfl.nu/0i59
  Replies (18) Good night (2142) Bad night (2677)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am. http://tfl.nu/ap7z
  Replies (30) Good night (625) Bad night (4586)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (781): I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house. http://tfl.nu/8emi
  Replies (13) Good night (5719) Bad night (1413)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (302): Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes. http://tfl.nu/niyo
  Replies (4) Good night (3883) Bad night (789)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (517): I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall... http://tfl.nu/myki
  Replies (18) Good night (9876) Bad night (2129)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (202): well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was. http://tfl.nu/pkp0
  Replies (9) Good night (2046) Bad night (1238)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (618): Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it. http://tfl.nu/ym59
  Replies (6) Good night (2377) Bad night (789)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (715): I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption. http://tfl.nu/d2pl
  Replies (6) Good night (1152) Bad night (534)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february http://tfl.nu/tz00
  Replies (2) Good night (1154) Bad night (537)
• Favorite

  (856): View more from New Jersey

  Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (856): Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before http://tfl.nu/gngt
  Replies (5) Good night (655) Bad night (546)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  "So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (304): "So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins http://tfl.nu/eetx
  Replies (1) Good night (1209) Bad night (365)
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (520): I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now. http://tfl.nu/zshk
  Replies (8) Good night (789) Bad night (351)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body http://tfl.nu/blet
  Replies (16) Good night (997) Bad night (532)
• Favorite

  (563): View more from Iowa

  You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (563): You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say. http://tfl.nu/uumg
  Replies (4) Good night (801) Bad night (252)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk http://tfl.nu/le2i
  Replies (1) Good night (270) Bad night (415)

Randomize