Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
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