It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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