Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Randomize
