Sry I called you an 8
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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