hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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