Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Randomize
