So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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