I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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