Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
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