I just made out with a guy for $7.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Randomize
