I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
