Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
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