I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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