Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
