I am puke
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
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I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
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