Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
