Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize
